Palm Tree, Palm Tree, Palm Tree

Embedded video no longer works on my laptop browser tumblr.  It just looks like the video is loading forever.  Is this cause of something in Chrome? Scriptsafe? McAfee?  

I don’t know, but it kinda sucks cause I would like to watch animal videos again sometime soon. 

I propose that there are few, if any, more stressful activities than driving around with a personalized cake in your car.

Check into the hotel in San Diego, and immediately ride the elevator with four fully-decked out CBP officers.  After they get off on their various floors, hotel employee tells me they’ve been staying here for a month.

k-a-t-e-f-e-a-r:

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SHOCKING, I AM SHOCKED

I can’t tell you how often my mom reads a headline aloud to me from FB and I say, “What’s the source?”  And then she clicks on the article, discovers it’s from some website she’s never heard of, and that the headline was completely misleading.

Debunking fake news stories is an excellent mother/daughter bonding experience.  High recommend.

(Also here’s the original article, which cites studies published in Science Advances by researchers at New York and Princeton Universities)

Wait, when did scrunchies become a thing again?

There is so much hilarity built into this story—like first of all, one of the lawsuits was filed by the union that represents Customs and Border Protection employees.  LOL. 

Second, the first case was decided for the employees in part because the federal government did not act in good faith, in that it failed to even investigate whether failure to pay their employees would be a violation of the Fair Labor Standards Act.  As summarized by BF (so questionable) but “[the judge] found that federal officials didn’t make any effort to explore how they could comply with labor laws during the 2013 shutdown, or seek a legal opinion on the issue…”  Of course, now in 2019, there’s legal precedent that they should have known they would be violating the FLSA by not paying employees.  There’s no getting around the good faith standard now.

Plus, if you wanted to get a legal opinion about whether you were doing something illegal, you might go to the Department of Justice….. which is currently unfunded.  

“A Justice Department spokesperson declined to comment.”   

L.O.L.

I’m just going to say it.  The government shutdown is a total political scam and this is how I know it:

The immigration court system has been underfunded and understaffed for decades leading to long delays in the processing of asylum claims.  Most recent figures put the number of back-logged cases at 800,000.  This situation is now being compounded, because the shutdown has closed the immigration courts.

The delay in asylum application processing creates an incentive for more refugees to come here. During processing delays, applicants for asylum live and work in the United States. They pay taxes here, start families here, lay down community roots here. They also send money back home to their struggling extended families.  More to the point, they at least temporarily escape the dire conditions that drove them from their home countries to begin with.

But instead of addressing at least one incentive for asylum applicants—a long process that allows applicants to live in safety for years while their claims are being considered—the administration is demanding construction of a border wall.  That is $5.7 billion to private contractors for a questionable construction project.  After weeks of trying to sell the wall to Americans as necessary to abate a security crisis, the administration has now changed its tune and is calling it a humanitarian crisis.  The border situation, in whatever you clothes you put it in, is entirely of the administration’s making.  The administration has been arbitrarily bottlenecking the number of asylum applications being accepted at ports of entry.  Applicants trying to enter safely are forced to wait indefinitely outside of ports of entry, maintaining their place in line, without safety and shelter.  Some, instead of waiting, are attempting to enter unlawfully so that their applications for asylum can be accepted right away.  The entire situation is of the government’s making.

Instead of building a wall, if you put $5.7 billion into the immigration court system, and committed government service to providing an expedient process for hearing asylum claims truly consistent with due process requirements, cases could be complete within a year, maybe two. A faster process could change the risk assessment asylum applicants make in deciding whether to try to come here.  There would be less time for them to build lives here before potentially being uprooted again.  Such a disincentive could significantly cut the number of applicants presenting themselves at our borders.

So why don’t immigration attorneys talk about this more?  Because this would inevitably lead to more and faster deportations, and this is not an abstract thing for us.  Asylum applicants are people we know personally.  We know them, we know their families.  We know where they work, where they go to church, where their children go to school, how much they pay in taxes—and YES, they pay taxes.  We also know where they come from.  We know that applicants with even the weakest asylum cases come from dire circumstances that we cannot even begin to comprehend.  We know what they have survived.

The real tragedy of this situation is that President Trump continues to use these people’s very real lives to try to manipulate voters.  And for some, it’s working.

There are real solutions to these problems.  President Trump isn’t interested in solutions.  He is only interested in telling you who is to blame.  The border wall is a scam and I hope you don’t fall for it.

The only time I recall singing a karaoke song was at a party in high school and I sang Butthole Surfers' "Pepper"

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Am I being punked?  I had never even heard of this song until @morebaffledlessbrooklyn said that it was his song a few days ago.  You guys should be mutuals or some shit.

I don't know if I'm on this bubble or not and I don't ever karaoke but if I did my song would without a shadow of a doubt be "Rock of Ages" by Def Leppard

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Yeah, all my followers were in very serious danger of getting blocked, but you in particular @duckandorpenguin.  Don’t worry.  You’re good now.

Picking a karaoke song is harder than a captcha tbh, so, to that end, I'm going with the Scarecrow's song, "If I Only Had A Brain."

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Picking a karaoke song is totally hard.  It’s very possible that I’m stealing some of these answers for the next time karaoke is called for.